Existentialism and Before the Law

So, after reading the two assigned pieces, I kind of find myself both depressed and intrigued by existentialism, all at the same time. In terms of how it, as a philosophy and theory, relates to Before the Law, the game and short story, I'd have to say that it acts as the very groundwork that both were built upon. Sarte's "Nausea" is the one that I truly connected to Before the Law more, and it's mainly because while both reading and playing, I found myself thinking about the games message on decision making and control over ones existence and purpose. In the story, the country man never takes control of his life, leaving it up to the guard at the gate to decide when he may pass. In the game, even when I chose to just walk through the gate, I was led to the "Law," which was just an empty book. In "Nausea," Sarte found himself in turmoil, trying to overcome or understand the idea of what it means to really "exist." He finds himself sickened by the idea that existing is just the concept of being there, of taking up space. There's no real purpose to exist other than the fact that if something is existing, it had already come into existence, and therefore could never truly escape it. To me, this felt almost nihilistic and extremely cynical, but, in terms of Before the Law, I felt like it was fairly accurate. In the story and game, the country man exists first, that much is fairly obvious. But, by using "Existentialism and Human Emotions" along with "Nausea," Sarte appears to have implied that the mans existence came first. His essence does not manifest itself until he makes the decision to wait or to go through the gate. However, the country man is then representing all of man, and what he thinks, subconsciously or consciously, men should strive to achieve or to pursue. So, by waiting, the suggestion could be made that instead of following our desires, we, as men, are at the mercy of what we are told or of a certain kind of implied authority. Then there's the game, in which I could go through the gate as the country man, showing that perhaps I believe all men should want to follow their own desires and should actively take the reins of their own lives. I am creating my essence, what/who I am, by my actions, all of this following my existence, in which I was just a man with a blank slate. The fact that the "Law" was blank might suggest that there really are no, in terms of Sarte, universal laws or guidelines for what life is comprised of, and that existence and meaning are both arbitrary things because they're both actively happening no matter what. Just my thoughts.